Dear Crabby, Are toilets clean?

Dear Crabby,

A family member of mine does not feel like any toilet is clean. They will not use public restrooms and they do not even like to use other people’s bathrooms when visiting. Do you think toilets are really that dirty or can I convince my relative that they are safe?

Sincerely, Clean Slate

Dear Clean Slate,

I know that your relative is not alone in this feeling. I have encountered many people who feel the same way about toilets in general. It is a place that deals with a lot of crud, if you know what I mean. I guess the way I look at it is that I do not see millions of people getting toilet disease at the moment. I am assuming that at least in the USA the majority of Americans use a toilet every day and the majority are not getting diseases. I have heard doctors say that most people’s bottoms are cleaner than their hands, and the hands are the parts that come in contact with other humans on a regular basis. But you know what, I will take the doctor’s word on that – I am not interested in where the most germs are. I do have a couple stories that always crack me up though about toilets. The first is my friend from the south, Johnny, and his cell phone experience. One day at work he came out of the bathroom screaming and yelling about something and we asked what was wrong. He said that he had just dropped his cell phone into the toilet. As if that wasn’t gross enough, I asked him how that happened when he was onDearCrabby the toilet. He went on to explain that he always sets the phone in the center of his underpants while he is using the facilities, and he stood up to finish and the phone dropped in the bowl. Remind me not to use anyone’s cell phone ever again! The other story is a little more recent yet, my son was telling me that they were working on the sewers outside his work the other day. All of the sudden someone reported that a toilet was shooting out the wrong way and brown water was soaking the bathroom! That’s right the sewer was apparently backed up, and it backed up right into the bathroom and shot out like Old Faithful! Thankfully no one was sitting there when that happened, or I am guessing they would have a serious issue using the toilet anywhere ever again! So I guess it’s up to each person to evaluate the risk and take whatever precaution they feel comfortable with. I think the data is out there, the tools are available to keep things sanitary, and the options are there to use other facilities if necessary. So thankfully this is not a show-stopper in our country. Other countries use the floor or the woods to do their business, so I guess we can be thankful we have indoor plumbing as least! Good luck and let me know how it goes.

Sincerely, Dear Crabby

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