Dear Crabby, Do You Have Any Ideas For a Spring Break Staycation?

Dear Crabby,

Another month and everything is still shut down. Since most of us were looking forward to spring break plans (which are now canceled) I wondered if you had any great staycation ideas we could try to alleviate the endless boredom we all feel.

Thanks,
Serenity Ahora

Dear Serenity Ahora,

Staycation? I believe you mean Coronacation. That is what all the hip kids are calling this moment in history. But lucky for you, this introvert has plenty of ideas to help you get over the disappointment of canceling a trip you spent months planning and paying for. Heck. When I was growing up, almost every family vacation we had was a ‘staycation.’ Granted, that was because we were poor, but someone forgot to tell us and we thought all those adventures we had close to home were pretty darn neat! Now, I get this instance is a bit different since we can’t congregate in public places and need to maintain a six-foot distance if we do, but I’ve been spending extra time on the Internet these days and I think I may have found some ideas for you to try.

If you’re looking to leave all your cares behind, get in a Key West frame of mind and join that salty sailor Jimmy Buffett for his The Cabin Fever spring 2020 Tour. Every Wednesday and Saturday, grab your Hawaiian shirts, grass skirts, and Margarita mix (if you have any left) and watch on Margaritaville.tv or listen on Radio Margaritaville on Sirius/XM. The broadcasts start at 8 p.m. EST, with an encore at 8:00 p.m. Pacific.

Did you have an epic Disney vacation planned? Well, pull out those coordinating family shirts and sit your butts down on the happiest couch in your living room to watch Disney+. Introduce your kids to the classics you enjoyed as a kid or hunker down for a Marvel marathon. Really. Now is the time to do it and not feel the slightest bit guilty about wasting all that time. And the monthly subscription fee is about the same price as one of those Dole Whip floats (the non-alcoholic version).

Dear Crabby Gives Advice

Maybe your tastes are a bit more refined and your spring break was all about arts and culture. If that’s the case, check out BroadwayHD, which is offering a free seven-day trial for access to hundreds of shows. If you want more after your trial ends, a monthly subscription is less than nine bucks a month. Not bad for the ‘cheap seats,’ huh? Other places you can ‘visit’ are famous museums, national parks, zoos, opera houses, and more! Just use Goggle and you’re sure to find something that interests you. Look. I realize none of these virtual alternatives replace being there, but for once aren’t you glad we have the technology that at least gives us this option? Otherwise, every home would look like an episode of Survivor or The Hunger Games.

My last suggestion would be what we did a lot as a family when I was a kid – pile in the car and take a drive. Remembering of course not to get out of your car and the only people IN your car should be your immediate family. Drive around the neighborhoods. Right now a lot of people are putting rainbows in their front windows and doors as a way to thank all the essential workforce people out there trying to keep us safe and stocked with the essentials during this corona-crazy time. For added fun, grab some snacks and make a Quaran-Tunes playlist to enjoy like the actress Rita Wilson did. I don’t know half the songs on her list, but the titles sure sound appropriate: “Don’t Stand So Close to Me” and “Staying Alive.”

I hope this helps you find someplace to go – er, stay. Right now I have to hide. Mrs. Crabby keeps hounding me to help her put together a 5,000-piece jigsaw puzzle of The Grand Canyon!

Dear Crabby

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