Dear Crabby, How Do I Avoid High-Priced Hair Salons?

Dear Crabby,
My wife likes to go to these high-priced hair salons and it drives me crazy. What can I do to stop her from spending all that money and find a way to have her get her hair trimmed for a reasonable amount?
Sincerely, Timmy Tightwad

Dear Mr. Tightwad,
Women and high-priced hair salons seem to go together like pork and beans, if you know what I mean.  To clarify, what I mean is that they are often seen together, not that they both cause a gassy discomfort.  I can remember my youthful years of wasted effort trying to find other ways to get our hair needs taken care of.  It always drove me nuts that the missus would spend half the day and half our savings getting a little trim and maybe a shade of color at some fancy nancy salon.  Oh, I was so upset one time that I vowed to find every discount I could in order to beat this system.  I clipped one of them coupons out of the Sunday paper to get a four dollar haircut at some local chain near the mall.  I went over there when they weren’t too busy and went with the first gal that offered to cut my hair.  After exchanging pleasantries, I told her that I just wanted a basic cut, going shorter on the sides and top to make me look smart.  She proceeded to cut my hair and ask me a zillion questions about my life, my family, my childhood, my thoughts on politics, my parents’ names, and anything else she could rattle off.  I put up with her as best I could, and then it happened.  That’s right, she said the worst comment you could ever hear from a hair snipper:  “Oops!”   There was silence for the first time in fifteen minutes.  I rotated my seat around and saw a nice line about two inches long just one inch above my ear. “I am so sorry, Mr. Crabby!  What would you like me to do?”  As I muttered noises and thought thoughts that the good Lord would need to forgive me for later, I finally said, “Just finish the job and let me go.”  Needless to say, that was the last time I used a discount chain and a four dollar coupon – on myself anyway.  The kids still needed haircuts, and I couldn’t believe the missus would take the little runts out to a salon to get it done.  We practically had to take out a payment plan each time.  One year, right before our traditional Thanksgiving family picture, I marched Junior into the bathroom and told him that I was gonna trim his hair myself.  I was doing really good too, until that darn plastic guard snapped off and I plowed a nice runway down the center of the little guy’s head. There were a lot of words said that day, many of which the good Lord will have to forgive Mrs. Crabby about at some point as well.  Interestingly, it was the only family picture we ever had where Junior got to wear his favorite Michigan State hat!  As you can tell, I never did find a way to beat the quality haircut racket.  I guess what my old man always told me is still true today:  “You get what you pay for!”  So, whenever the missus heads out for the salon, I take some deep breaths and recite my well-rehearsed lines like, “You’re gonna look marvelous, Dear!” or “I can’t wait to see my new movie star,” or my all-time favorite, “How can they improve upon perfection, My Love?”  And then, whatever she looks like when she comes back, I just whistle and hope to high heaven that she won’t tell me what she just paid!  So good luck, and be sure to let me know if you find anything better out there.

Sincerely, Dear Crabby

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  1. I have to agree. Trust me, most women would much rather spend her (or your) hard earned money on something other than a haircut and highlights, but let me assure you that there is NOTHING worse that a bad dye job or a unprofessional cut. We women, want to look nice…for you (our hubby’s) and as my husband says, “for each other” meaning other women. Some things are worth spending more on…and highlights and a great cut is definitely one of them!! We realize you don’t exactly “get it” but we thank you for trusting us on this one. Your sacrifice is worth it…TRUST ME!

  2. Good hair salons are hard to find. Do you have any suggestions in the Rochester area?

  3. Dear Mr.Crabby, I have been a hairstylist for 27 years, so when I read Timmy Tightwads question ,I cringed with fear at what your answer might be. I have also been asked this question by husbands and wives alike. Your answer was priceless! I ,too, have used this same response.While there are very capable stylists who work in “low-price” salons, usually the price reflects location and most importantly , experience.I’ve attended many schools to further my education in fashion and technique. Not only that, but as you stated, maturity in what to discuss with your clients and what to avoid is very important! Above all, your experience in a high-priced salon should include an exceptional haircut, a good listener not gossiper and the upmost service . This starts from when you walk through that door and are greeted warmly by the receptionist, your relaxing shampoo and fabulous cut. You should look good and feel great when you happily walk back out. Thank you for again for understanding and printing how important it is for both women and men!

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