Dear Crabby, Is Paying for a Stranger’s Coffee Weird?

Dear Crabby,

I’ve been on the receiving end of a stranger buying my coffee out-of-the-blue and it really made my day. So, I decided to pay it forward and do the same for someone else, but the woman got mad at me when I tried and told me that it was weird. Is it?

Thanks, JoAnna Java

Dear JoAnna Java,

DearCrabbyI don’t drink much coffee these days. It’s on a long list of things Mrs. Crabby is convinced could kill me. So instead I get to choke down a glass of prune juice every morning. This is why I recommend not getting old… or getting married. But aside from that, I don’t see how someone offering to pay, with their money, for something I was going to buy anyway, is weird. It sounds like the woman who copped an attitude just isn’t used to people being nice to her. My suggestion would be that the next time you want to unexpectedly treat someone, just go ahead and do it. Don’t even give the person the option to decline. This works idea works really well when going through the drive thru. Just tell the cashier you’re paying for the car behind you and get on with your day. You never know what your small act of kindness will spark. Maybe the person you paid for will pay for the person behind them and so on. You know I’m not an overly sentimental person, but offering to buy another human a cup of coffee is just being kind; and the least the person on the receiving end could do is have the deceny to be courteous about it.

Here’s hoping your next half-caf, double-shot latte is a good one!

Sincerely, Dear Crabby

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About Dear Crabby

Stuck in a rut? Need some biased advice from a crabby old baby-boomer? Read regularly by thousands and loved by some, Dear Crabby answers questions weekly to life's challenges. Send him a note at

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