Dear Crabby,
My son is in high school and he is taking the vocational classes to obtain credit towards the Police Academy. He loves it, and I am happy that he is enjoying his time with the officers. However, he is citing me for every little violation I make, from jaywalking to not coming to a complete stop at stop signs! What should I do with my little Barney Fife?
Sincerely, Not Aunt Bee
Dear Not Aunt Bee,
Well, I am no stranger to disobeying the law. I still claim that I have never had a ticket, although those close to me will debate that. When I was just 16 years old, I was leaving a friend’s house whose father was the Captain of the Fire Department in their city. They told me that if I ever got pulled over by a police officer to drop his name and they would let me go. Well, a few minutes later I was able to test that theory. I was going about 45 miles per hour and apparently it was a max of 25 miles per hour in the area where I was at. So I told the officer that I had just come from the Captain’s house and was on my way home. Maybe this guy was new, or just plain did not care that I knew the Captain of the Fire Department, but he gave me the full ticket just the same. When my father and I went to court to see about getting out of this ticket, the judge was merciless on every kid that went before me! The last kid before me got up and said that he wanted to be placed on probation, where the ticket would not count if he could complete one year without getting any more tickets. The judge said that would be a great idea, but that needed to be discussed and approved with the officer giving the ticket before appearing in court. Then, the judge gave him the full penalty with the ticket and the poor kid left crying. Just then the judge was interrupted and told us to take a 10 minute recess. My dad quickly found the officer that gave me the ticket and asked if we could arrange this probation thing. He agreed, and the rest is history – no ticket on record for me and I have never received a ticket since. That does not mean that I wasn’t pulled over though. Mrs. Crabby gets so irritated because every time I was ever pulled over the officers say, “Well, you don’t have any tickets on your record, so you certainly do not want one now. Go on and be safe now.” The most frustrating experience for Mrs. Crabby was when an officer pulled me over and said to me, “That should be a ticket.” He then walked away from me as he was in the middle of tending to another lawbreaker. I assumed we were finished with the conversation, so I drove away. The missus was appalled. So, as you can see, I may not be the best person to ask about these things. I like the fact that your son is interested in doing his best. Keep encouraging him, and try not to get any more infractions this month!
Sincerely, Dear Crabby
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