Dear Crabby,
I keep hearing that the gas prices are going to continue going up. Should we be worried about that?
Sincerely, Penny Pinching
Dear Ms. Pinching,
I have seen these cycles for years. People get comfortable with the gas prices, and then they all go out and buy the biggest SUV you have ever seen. Then a war breaks out ten thousand miles away and the gas prices go up ten cents a gallon and you can’t give those big trucks away. I, for one, am not a big fan of worrying about the gas prices. I have always lived my life in such a way that I worked close to home, and I conducted my daily activities all within my community. I can remember however, having a neighbor that was insanely worried about the gas prices.
Dear Crabby Gives Advice
One year, he went out and bought his wife this diesel-powered Oldsmobile. It sounded like a big Mack truck, and he stank every time he tried to fill it with fuel. He would come over to brag about how much he was saving compared with my gasoline-powered Olds. Then one day the diesel prices went way up. He immediately had a fire sale and took a huge loss on that thing in order to run out and buy some foreign, compact car. Then he came over bragging about how many miles per gallon he got compared to my Olds. He would bring over his little notebook and show me his miles that week and how many gallons he put in, and he would say, “See, I got 30 miles per gallon again this week!” I was so sick and tired of his ranting and raving, that I decided to have some fun with it. That night I went over and siphoned out about a gallon of gas from his tank. I put it in a gas can in my garage.
By the end of that week, he was cursing and yelling over in his garage as he was doing the numbers. As I fought back my laughter, I asked him what the problem was. He told me his mileage had gone way down. Now, it was July and we were in a drought, so I told him he needed to stop running the air and roll all the windows up in order to really get good mileage. Later that night, I snuck over and put two gallons back into his tank. Oh my, you should have seen him the rest of that summer. He would come home from work sweating like a pig and gasping for air cause he was so hot in that car. But he was smiling ear to ear telling me that he was getting better mileage than the manufacturer even said was possible. I would smile too and tell him that I was really happy for him. I eventually stopped sneaking over and messing with his gas tank, but I never did tell him about my little prank. He still drives around with the windows up and the air off, too. Somehow it still makes me feel better. So, as far as the gas prices go, I think it’s like taxes: they will always go up eventually. Good luck and drive safe.
Sincerely, Dear Crabby
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