Dear Crabby, What Size Turkey Should I Buy?

Dear Crabby,

What size turkey should I roast for Thanksgiving Dinner?

Thanks, Birdy Day

Dear Birdy Day,

The bigger, the better, I always say. When it comes to Thanksgiving, America’s first holiday, go big! Leftovers are one of the best things about the noble bird. Now that I’m retired, it lends itself to turkey leftovers for breakfast, lunch and dinner – for days – until it is gone. They say one and half pounds per person. I say plan on five pounds per person. I convince Mrs. Crabby that we have to plan on that much in case the invited bring guests – we always open our door to welcome anyone who needs a home for the holidays – it’s the right thing to do. Thankfully, she agrees.

Dear Crabby with a Laptop ComputerI look forward to big helpings of white and dark meat, barely hanging on the plate, and a ton of sides. Mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, green beans, squash, root veggies, gravy, stuffing, wild rice, hot dinner rolls, butter, more gravy and cranberry sauce all flood the table and fill the plates. Coffee and hot mulled cider to wash down dessert comes next. Apple pie, pumpkin pie, pistachio nut bread and ice cream make it a sweet ending. Then we do it again, in smaller portions, before the day is over. Days of leftovers and new ways to gobble up what is left are a thrill. We stuff ourselves with turkey sandwiches, turkey soup, turkey chili, turkey kabobs, turkey stir-fry – you name it we’ve tried it.

One year one of the kids did Thanksgiving. Poor planning led to one meal per person. We had dessert, I took the couch and fell asleep to the Lions loosing, and when I woke up I headed straight to the kitchen for round two. The women folk were cleaning up. No more turkey. What? I had to survive on two dinner rolls with a thin layer of cold gravy as my second Thanksgiving meal. I guess for the grace I should have said “Thank you for the meals we’re about to receive for next several days …” And from there on, it was back to the Crabby house for Thanksgiving.

So, when it comes time to buy that turkey, consider the leftovers the men look forward to, and go big. Fresh and local is better over frozen. However, and I can’t emphasize this enough, get a big bird. And if you have too many leftovers, I’ll be happy to come and help you finish.

Sincerely, Dear Crabby

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