Dear Crabby, Will You Go to Prom with Me?

Dear Crabby,

Not sure if you’re aware, but it’s prom season. I was actually a bit excited that my twins (both girls) were old enough to attend this year… until they told me how much it would cost. Why are proms so expensive?

Near Bankrupt,
Ariel Triton

Dear Mrs. Triton,

Oh, I do not envy you. My kids are long past prom age, but I’m enjoying watching them deal with the crazy that surrounds prom these days with their kids. Be thankful you don’t have a son. Have you heard about those ‘promposals?’ It’s just like asking someone to marry you, but instead you ask them to prom! I mean some of these kids are going all out: staging elaborate clues that end with the guy asking, ‘Will you go to prom with me?’ Some even parade the young lady out in front of a packed school assembly, while others ‘hire’ their buddies or school club to serenade the young lady into going. And the list of over-the-top ideas go on and on. That’s a lot of pressure for a guy! The most stress I had for my prom was asking my dad if I could borrow his prized ’54 Chevy and then praying that no one dinged it at some point during the night. I mean I was nervous enough proposing to Mrs. Crabby when I was in my 20’s. And don’t even get me started on how much proms are costing these days—you have to take out a small loan! Seriously. I was reading in the newspaper the other day that the average, the average, cost for a kid to attend a prom these days is close to $1,000 smackaroos. Are the tickets made of gold? Are they serving caviar? I mean, why on earth has one night become so expensive? Good grief. It’s like they have mush for brains. And shame on you parents who are letting your doe-eyed children fleece you into paying for it all. I’m not against prom or kids having a good time… just as long as Johnny or Susie coughs up the dough just like Mrs. Crabby and I had to for our big day.

Hope your kids have a swell time and don’t end up taking you to the cleaners.
Dear Crabby

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