Happy Medium

Being in the middle of things seems to get a bad rap. A middle child often gets the “acts out for attention” label, even if both other siblings do the same kind of things. Starbucks doesn’t label their middle size “medium.” They go from tall to venti, completely skipping the word that implies being in between. And no one wants to be caught saying “I’m in between jobs” because that generally implies an undesirable negative situation.

Personally, I am usually wishing I could be in the middle if things, and happily be there. It seems I’m always feeling the extremes. I can be so excited about going on a vacation, but completely overwhelmed with preparations that I don’t even want to go anymore. Or take when Labor Day comes. I’m anxious for the kids to be back in school so I can have a break, but that first week hits and I’m in tears because I miss their busy chaos. Why is it that we just can’t rest in the moment, appreciating things and occasions for what they are?

The happy medium seems to be an oxymoron these days. I don’t know many people who feel at peace right in the middle of where they are. We are always striving in different areas of life for less and more all at once. More money… less stress. More time to get things done… less muffin top around the waist. More confidence… less fear. Life is relentless in pushing us to hurry, yet we coincidently are always waiting for the next thing too.  How do we find contentment when we are in the midst of the good, the bad, and the ugly? Is it really possible to be calm and rational in any moment despite our external circumstances?

There are some things that we can do that have the potential to help us make content with the moment. One way I’ve managed to grasp hold of that pendulum of emotions is to recognize some very tough and powerful realities. As much as we don’t like it, no matter what happens, we are wise to remember that life always goes on. We may want to freeze time, keep our children little, keep wrinkles and grey hair at bay, but we know the impossibility of that. As tough as today is, tomorrow always comes, and a new sun rises. It’s also important to be intentionally aware of our mortality. Our days are numbered and we never know how long we have with those we love. It’s sobering, yet it’s an extremely effective perspective changer when you accept our limited existence.

I don’t think most of us will achieve perfect rationality, especially when life is ever changing and we can’t predict tomorrow’s challenges. I believe all things are possible though. I’m an eternal optimist and always hopeful for beating the odds. I don’t always remember that as I’m wiping up the spilled tea, the baby is crying, and the dog is incessantly barking at the mail person, but we have a huge impact on those around us when we do live in the happy medium of the moment. It may not be the destination we desire, or the situation we would choose, but it is where we are. And it is our heart and our choices that can make the middle of anything the best place to be.